March Madness is here and your bracket got blown up in the first round. So much for winning Warren Buffett’s cash.
However, the Dirty Turban March Madness Billion Dollar* Bracket of the Absurd continues. Vote early, vote often and you could win.
*there is no billion, but you could win a Dirty Turban t-shirt. Retweet to win.
#1 Red Vines vs. #9 J.D. Salinger
Red Vines are a delicious red licorice candy that tastes great with Mr. Pibb.
Salinger wrote The Catcher in the Rye then promptly stopped writing to live in the woods of New Hampshire. What a phony.
#12 The Clapper vs. #13 Bangkok
The Clapper is a sound activated electric switch invented by a one-armed man named Philip Gerard in 1963.
Bangkok is the capital of Thailand – the land of smiles – where the chlamydia is free.
#11 St. Elmo’s Fire vs. #3 Slimer
St. Elmo’s Fire is a weather phenomenon where “fire” appears on inanimate objects like Rob Lowe.
Slimer was the slime spewing green ghost featured in the Ghostbuster films. He would later let fame and fortune get to his head and die of a heroin and hot dog speedball.
#10 The Planck epoch vs. #2 Charles Bronson
The Planck epoch is the earliest period of time in the universe. Note to self: Create band, name it The Planck Epoch, win Grammy, have sex with groupies, check into rehab.
Charles Bronson was an American actor that starred in such films as Death Wish, The Dirty Dozen, Death Wish 4 and was the voice of Velma on Scooby-Doo.
Stay tuned throughout the NCAA Tourney for new polls in the Dirty Turban’s March Madness Bracket of the Absurd and you could win a billion dollars*.
*there is no billion dollar jackpot, but there is a handsome new Dirty Turban t-shirt.