The trailer park Super Bowl is here! Grab your sister-cousin and pull the big screen out on the front porch it’s WrestleMania 30! Now I admit I haven’t been much of a wrestling fan since about the age of 12, but I’ll don my Hulk Hogan costume one last time (look, it still fits!) and head to the bar today to watch this “athletic” event with the boys and reminisce about the Iron Sheik, Roddy Piper and Superfly Snuka. Those were the days. Wonder what Cyndi Lauper is up to now?
Here are the top 5 WrestleMania matches of all time.
5. Randy Savage vs. Ric Flair – WrestleMania VIII
Oh yeeaahhh! Someone get me a Slim Jim.The Macho Man took down the Nature Boy and captured the WWE title. Guru confession #452: Miss Elizabeth was my first crush. And by “crush” I mean I went through a lot of hand cream and tissues.
4. “Stone Cold” Steve Austin vs. The Rock – WrestleMania XVII
Stone Cold vs. The Rock caused many a playground dust-up, family fisticuffs and a number of cousins divorcing cousins in the state of Texas as fans couldn’t decide who to root for. Ultimately, Austin knocked the Rock out stone cold with a chair and all was right with the world.
3. Bret Hart vs. Shawn Michaels – WrestleMania XII
The Hit Man lost his title to the pretty boy in a match that lasted well over an hour and actually seemed like a real sporting event. You almost fooled me, Vince McMahon. He also fooled Brett too as he thought he, not Michaels, was supposed to win the fight.
2. The Undertaker vs. Shawn Michaels – WrestleMania XXV
It was good vs. evil, the angel vs. the devil, Timberlake vs. Kanye! One of the best WrestleMania matches ever wasn’t even the main event that year. I forget what it was. Mr. T vs. Lou Albano maybe? Don’t know, but The Undertaker delivered his signature tombstone and that was it for HBK.
1. Hulk Hogan vs. Andre the Giant – WrestleMania III
Probably the greatest moment to ever occur in the history of sports and maybe the world – if you are 11-years-old at the time. This match made the WWE what it is today, turned the Hulkster into a world wide superstar, a cartoon character and Mr. Nanny. Andre would go on to star in The Princess Bride and drink 156 beers in one sitting at a hotel bar.
What did we miss, wrestling fans? Leave a comment.
Featured Writer: The Guru