Good Afternoon Dirty Turbaners, it is I the Maharaja of daily fantasy baseball Ralph Lifshitz. I am the only known fake Jewish Maharaja in the known world, so I have that distinction going for me. I’m joining you on this glorious June day because the Guru approached me about purchasing a little Breaking Bad-blue. After I told him that I in no way had any meth for sale, he followed up by suggesting I contribute to the Turban a few times a week and bestow my DFS knowledge on y’all. I was more than happy to oblige that request and here I am.
Well, now that we’ve gotten awkward introductions out of the way, onto the DraftKings picks for the day.
BTW all of my articles will be followed up with hearty internet handshakes for the men and gropey creepy Uncle lingering a little too long hugs for the ladies.
All values are based on DraftKings pricing.
SP 1 – Mat Latos, $9,200: This is as much about his opponent as it is about him, or the fact that his wife Dallas would probably blow me up on twitter if I didn’t suggest him. That biyatch is cray! She also reminds me of a stripper I met in West Virginia at a club called “Southern Exposure.” Is it the same person? Could it be? Noooooo? Anythewho, Latos gets the weak hitting and whiff happy Cubbies today at Wrigley. The Cubs have the 3rd highest K% in all of the Majors at 23.1% a .2 behind the K% leading Marlins. They are also 28th in runs scored, 28th in RBI’s, 29th in Batting avg., 29th in wOBA, and 29th in wRC+. I’m not sure I have more ways to tell you they stink. Oh wait there you go….they stink! Latos’ K rate has been down this season in his 2 starts since returning but I expect it to recover to his K norm of 8.
SP 2 – Collin McHugh, $9,000: The Mighty Mick of Texas has been En Fuego this year as he’s cruised along in his 11 starts putting up 2.76 ERA supported by 9.92 K%, .55 hr’s per 9. He’s gotten. Tad lucky with his BABIP with a .255 but his FIP is 2.97 and his LOB% is 73.1. So nothing is crazy out of whack. He gets the strikeout prone Braves today and I wouldn’t be shocked to see him approach double digit K’s. The braves have a K% of 22.9%, just behind the aforementioned Cubs. They are also 25th in wOBA and 24th in wRC+.
C – Caleb Joseph, $2,000: Guru has talked about punting catcher before and that’s what this is, an upside punt play. Joseph has been hot and a price of $2,000 opens up a lot of cash for other places in my lineup. Makes sure he’s in the lineup, if he is, there’s a lot of Jelly in these donuts Frank!
1B – Edwin Encarnacion, $5,800: He who trots with parrot has been this season’s Sultan of Swat, banging 24 dongs this season. Yikes that’s a dirty sentence! Even more remarkable is he had only two homers going into May. Since then he’s hit 22! The only thing that seems to be able to slow him down is Mark Teixeira’s elbow. What, does Teixeira’s elbow think it’s John McDonald’s knee? Encarnacion stayed in the game, though he seemed noticeably dazed in his next at bat drawing a walk and not realizing it. If he’s good to go and in the lineup I see no reason not to trust him. If he’s out of the lineup go Goldy for $400 bones less.
2B – Derek Dietrich, $3,200: I feel like the only person that loves Dietrich more than Guru is his own mother. It seems like he’s suggested Double D nearly a dozen times thus far in 2014. Since his return to the bigs after a brief stint in the minors, Dietrich has scored a run in each game. Not to worry, the reason for the demotion was Double D’s defense, because he’s been one of the better offensive players at the keystone in 2014. In fact Dietrich’s been a top 10 2nd baseman according to wOBA and wRC+, coming in ahead of brand names like Pedroia, Kipnis, Zobrist, Dee Gordon, and Brandon Phillips. He faces A.J. Burnett who happens to throw a fair amount of breaking balls, this is good for Dietrich because he has hit breaking balls pretty well thus far in his young career.
3B – Todd Frazier, $4,700: Three of my next five picks are Reds as I’m mini-stacking against Edwin Jackson at Wrigley. Truth be told Jackson has been a bit unlucky not really earning his 5.12 ERA according to his peripherals but it’s not like Jackson hasn’t been blow-up prone throughout his much traveled career. I’m anticipating an implosion tonight on Chi-Chi’s Northside and I expect Frazier to be the catalyst. During his breakout 2014 T-Frazy has hit righties to the tune of .276 with 13 of his 17 knocks coming against them. He’s 4-for-12 lifetime against Jackson, which truthfully doesn’t tell me much other than he won’t struggle against him.
SS – Jonathan Villar, $3,200: Coming into 2014 I had Villar pegged as a sleeper at the SS position. Though he produced some solid power/speed numbers early, his batting average was wretched enough to earn him a demotion to the waiver wire on all my fake teams. Well, after a long stretch of sub Mendoza line hitting, Villar has started to heat up again the last two weeks. Hitting .263 with 3 steals and a homer. I’m not saying there aren’t better options out there but I’m confident on the return at the price point.
OF 1- Billy Hamilton, $4,900: Over the last month Hamilton has started to justify the hyperbole so many of us had spewed over the last couple of years about Hamilton. He’s been a top 10 batter in all formats putting up a 19/3/16/13/.308/.807 stat line over the last 30. Speed plays on DraftKings and Hamilton is the second chip in my Reds stack tonight.
OF 2 – Jay Bruce, $4,500: The last puzzle piece to my hopefully successful Red’s stack has started to put his early season woes behind him hitting 9/2/6/1/.296/.985. The all-time numbers against Jackson aren’t great at 3/17 with 6 K’s, but I’m going to take a chance on Bruce. When he gets hot he’s scorching.
Make sure to check the lineups, give a look at the weather and I toast your team with slightly chilled Manischewitz.
Contributing Writer: Ralph Lifshitz