Nice work, Fox News Minnesota. You have to admit though, if you’re going to completely f**k up a story on domestic violence this is the only way to do it.
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Move over, Bobby Flay, you’re a dick anyway. The Food Network has a new star and it’s Aunt Phee who is cookin’ up something that “ain’t no mutherf***in’ prison food.”
Delicious! Hey Food Network, put her on Chopped or Iron Chef. If Aunt Phee don’t win she’s gonna cut a bitch.
[turban tip Barstool]
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I don’t know why, maybe it’s weird Wednesday, but I can’t stop watching this vid created by artist Guy Trefler.
Check out Guy’s YouTube channel for other cool stuff that’ll blow your mind and waste five minutes of your work day.
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My dad and I did a lot of cool things together. He took me to my first game at Fenway, taught me how to drive a stick when I was 12, told me always hit on 15 and introduced me to the wonders of scotch. Thanks, dad. But, how come you never taught me how to do this?
I feel like my entire childhood was a mirage now.
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During Saturday’s Giants-Dodgers game in San Fran a couple bros took to McCovey Cove to grill up some brats, down a few brews and they were wearing horse masks.
You stay weird, San Francisco.
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In an attempt to stay relevant and reclaim audience’s attention, ESPN chose to allow sports “reporter” (I use that term loosely) Stephen A. Smith to weigh in on his thoughts regarding the Ray Rice suspension for domestic violence on this morning’s First Take. Needless to say, Smith proved that opinions are like a**holes, and everybody has one, but also that some people are them.
In his segment this morning, Smith implied that women are to blame for domestic violence and that they should “try not to provoke men.”
ESPN colleague Michelle Beadle agreed with Smith’s new role as “ESPN’s A-hole of the Year,” and an ESPN-themed Twitstorm ensued. .
So I was just forced to watch this morning’s First Take. A) I’ll never feel clean again B) I’m now aware that I can provoke my own beating.
— Michelle Beadle (@MichelleDBeadle) July 25, 2014
I’m thinking about wearing a miniskirt this weekend…I’d hate to think what I’d be asking for by doing so @stephenasmith. #dontprovoke
— Michelle Beadle (@MichelleDBeadle) July 25, 2014
I was in an abusive relationship once. I’m aware that men & women can both be the abuser. To spread a message that we not ‘provoke’ is wrong
— Michelle Beadle (@MichelleDBeadle) July 25, 2014
Violence isn’t the victim’s issue. It’s the abuser’s. To insinuate otherwise is irresponsible and disgusting. Walk. Away.
— Michelle Beadle (@MichelleDBeadle) July 25, 2014
Smith then, showing that he is the master of the side step, took to the twittersphere with an even more long-winded Twitter rant to try to disseminate his budding reputation as a complete a**hole:
I wonder what the “A” in Stephen A. Smith stands for? Hmmm, after seeing his “commentary” and reading the tweets, this single yet glamorously beautiful southern gal has an idea, but I dare say it out loud, I wouldn’t want to provoke a man to hit me.
[turban tip Deadspin and USA Today]
Contributing Writer: Dixie Darling
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You know how there are 2.3 million American’s in prison? Can we make that 2.3 million and one?
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While I’m not a big fan of their pies (what next, a pizza stuffed with chicken wings?), the folks at Pizza Hut have teamed up with Leonardo, Raphael, Michelangelo and Donatello to create the greatest weapon in the history of turtlekind – A life-size version of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Pizza Thrower.
Watch out Comic-Con geeks, you’re about to get bashed in the face by large chucks of cheesy goodness.
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According to the YouTube description, Niklas Daniel and fellow death wisher Brianne Thompson jumped out of a DHC-6 Twin Otter at 5,000ft. landing perfectly on a waterslide at around 50mph. Watch out for rocks!
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This beats anything I saw during last night’s snoozefest known as the Home Run Derby. Next year they should cover Chris Berman in bees.
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the DIRTY TURBAN 