Red Sox Trade Jon Lester to Oakland For Yoenis Cespedes and Jonah Hill

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You have to hand it to Billy Brad Pitt Beane, he’s got some some big money balls. Thursday morning, the Boston Red Sox shipped ace left-hander and two-time World Series champion Jon Lester (along with American hero Jonny Gomes) to Beane’s Oakland A’s for slugger Yoenis Cespedes and Academy Award nominated actor Jonah Hill.

When asked to comment, Billy Pitt said, “I know Jonah got a couple Oscar nominations, but this money ball stuff is getting kinda old. We’d like to win a playoff game. Besides, Angelina and I have 42 kids to feed.”

Red Sox general manager Ben Cherington said, “Cespedes gives us a big righty bat at Fenway and we sure hope we get the fat Jonah Hill because the skinny one isn’t as funny and just looks weird.”

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(VIDEO) Jack White Throws Out First Pitch…To Santa

Who knew that former White Striper, rockin’ Raconteur and plank spanker Jack White was such a huge baseball fan. First he was spotted really enjoying a Cubs game and Tuesday night he threw out the first pitch at Comerica Park in his hometown of Detroit.

Jack White threw tonight's first pitch to Santa!

A post shared by @tigers on

Not sure why Santa Claus was there, but maybe this is the year he delivers a World Series to the Motor City.

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(VIDEO) Bartolo Colon is a Professional Athlete

420-pound, 41-year-old New York Mets starting pitcher Bartolo Colon has a secret to his success: His pregame stretching regiment.

Seems to be working. Fartolo threw 7 1/3 innings of one-run ball Monday night as the Mets beat the Phils 7-1.

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(PHOTO) Rockies Give Away 15k ‘Tulowizki’ Jerseys #Fail

The Colorado Rockies gave away 15,000 Troy Tulowitzki jerseys to their loyal fans over the weekend. The only problem is they misspelled their star shortstops name.

Tulo

Nice work, Rockies. Spelling is hard. Now may be the time to lay off that Rocky Mountain green bud.

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(PHOTO) WTF File: Just Two Bros Grilling in McCovey Bay…In Horse Masks

During Saturday’s Giants-Dodgers game in San Fran a couple bros took to McCovey Cove to grill up some brats, down a few brews and they were wearing horse masks.

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You stay weird, San Francisco.

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